


The Fake Job

by VentMonster (strega)



Category: Leverage, Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: F/M, Fake AH Crew, I Don't Even Know, I just kind of had an idea, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Set after the end of Leverage, There may eventually be explicit content, i'm so bad at tags, so we're going to see how this goes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-03
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-04-29 16:45:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5135111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strega/pseuds/VentMonster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hardison wants to take the Fake AH Crew down. Parker wants to prove she's a better thief. Eliot just wants to live.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Setup

When Eliot had started the morning, he should've known it would be full of nope. He'd woken up with a pain in his neck from sleeping too hard at an awkward angle, Parker had left a fucking harness in the floor like he'd told her a thousand times not to do, meaning in his not-quite-awake state he'd tripped over it, and his shower hadn't been long enough before there was knocking on the door, Hardison's voice filtering through, "Hurry up, Eliot, I found us a job!" and the slightly excited tone in his voice made Eliot cringe. An excited Hardison meant a new kind of job, which never ended well for Eliot.

Hardison had been surprisingly good at running the cons, he had an eye for detail, and he'd learned his lesson the first time Nate had let him run things, and it was working for the trio now. He did, however, occassionally bite off more thasn he could chew. The warning sign to that? A little bit too excited to work.

Eliot really just wanted to go back to bed.

He grunted his thanks to Parker when she handed him a coffee, not giving a damn about the heat of it as he sat down, glaring ahead at really nothing as Parker nimbly climbed over the back of the couch, sitting beside Eliot, "He tell you what he has in plan?" he grumbled over the rim of the coffe.

Parker snorted, twisting her hair up neatly, "What do you think?"

The two shared a similar smile, before imitating Hardison's voice, "It's all in the reveal, man." breaking off into snickers as Hardison entered the room.

"Alright! I have the Job of jobs, capital J and everything." Hardison couldn't stop grinning, moving passed the pair on the couch, not noticing them exchanging not-so-excited glances.

"You gonna bring it up on the screen or is the wait supposed to be part of the fun?" Eliot asked dryly, raising an eyebrow pointedly.

"Could you not suck the fun out of this one for me?" Hardison's brow arched right back as he stood in front of the screen and faced his partners, "And be just a little more excited about this?"

"Hardison." Eliot's and Parker's voices mixed together, conveying their warning.

"Alright, alright!" Hardison hit the button, grin wide as the images and words flickered over the screen, "We're gonna-"

"No." Eliot stated firmly, tone completely serious.

Hardison's face crumpled a bit, waving at his screen, "You haven't even heard the plan!"

"No. And I don't want to." Eliot shook his head, not looking at the man, focused on the bright green rubber ducky in a broken circle, a lighthearted symbol for a very dark crew, "Do you understand what you're wanting to do? Fully understand?"

"Yes. We're gonna take out the Fake AH Crew." 

"Those crazy people in Los Santos who gun down cops, civilians, and gangs alike for fun?" Parker's tone was wary.

"See! Parker knows they're bad people! And we take down bad people!"

"No, Hardison! We take out cushy, corrupt CEOs, or conmen who hurt good people! There's a fine line between Bad and Fucking Nuts!" Eliot set the cup down a little harsher than necessary, "We stay out of gangs' business, because that's a can of worms you don't want to mess with!"

"We took down that mobster Moscone! And the O'Hare family thing!"

"We got lucky! Mobs have a code of conduct! Those people?!" Eliot waved vaguely at the screen, "I've done work with the Vagabond, I know what he's capable of! The Brownman's sniper skills are legendary, and I don't think you undrstand how much danger is in his body. Mogar is uncontrollable, the bigger the blast radius, the better. Gavino's a surprisingly good thief, he'd give Parker a run for her money, but he's got enough charm to make you think you'd given him your money. Overlord, probably the most sane of the group, can fly anything, and honestly, she'll kill you with a smile just as quickly, but Ramsey? Ramsey convinced a Grand Jury that he was an innocent man in a case where they had a bosy, the murder weapon, and eyewitnesses. Do you understand, Hardison? The man killed someone, in broad daylight, for looking at Gavino wrong. And just for fun, went to court over it. And fucking won!"

Parker, completely missing the point, glared at Eliot, "You think someone's as good as me?"

"Parker, that's not-"

"No, no, you think someone's better than me. We're going."

Hardison smirked in triumph. Eliot was outvoted, and he'd go along just to keep them safe,  
"Now are you ready to hear my plan?"

Eliot let out a groan. He hated today. They were going to die, or at least be maimed, and Hardison didn't care.


	2. The Pawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, life decided to be an asshole, but here it is! Chapter 2!

"This is a bad idea." Eliot reiterated for probably the millionth time, but hey, maybe someone would actually listen to him now. No one did. He wasn't that lucky.

They were playing a long con, Parker having the biggest advantage, because very few people knew who she was, Hardison wanted to work her as an up and coming gang leader or something, but Hardison knew this wasn't going to work, so he really didn't care about the plan too much. Except Hardison, the genius he was, wanted to recruit the Brownman.

"Eliot, it's gonna be fine. I'm serious, he's the weakest link. He'll do anything for money, and people like him have no real loyalty, anyway." Hardison waved a hand, not noticing the way Eliot grit his teeth.

Eliot was one of those people, sure, he hit people for good reason for now, but he generally did it for the money.

"Besides, he's already on his way into the building." Parker swung in through the window, dusting herself off, moving to sit in the chair in the center of their rented space in Los Santos, "He's tinier than I thought he'd be."

"Don't let that fool you, Parker, he's just as dangerous as me."

"Yeah, but he likes guns."

Eliot was not having this conversation, instead leaving the room to play surprise muscle when he was cued, doing one last comm check before he went radio silent, reliant on Hardison and Parker. He tuned out the unimportant bits of the conversation, focusing on waiting for his cue. It didn't take too long, Parker couldn't keep Brownman's interest too well. She knew the slang well enough, but she didn't know how their world worked well enough to keep their mark on the hook. That was why they needed Eliot.

Well, that and for him to look scary. He could manage that.

He took his time leaving the room he'd been in, moving down the hall like he had all the time in the world, a gruff, "You wanted me, Boss?" it rolled off his tongue easily, eyes lifting from the ground to the pretty blond sitting like a queen in her chair, taking in Ray's reaction from his peripherals.

Ray's eyes widened, a grin growing on his face as he not so subtly checked Eliot out, "Damn, Eliot, have you gotten even more muscly? I mean, your hair's longer and you ditched the bandanna, so there's that improvement."

Eliot was kind of proud that Parker and Hardison didnt let their surprise show, but Parker did narrow her eyes at him, "You've met?" she asked easily, and only Hardison and Eliot would pick up the accusation in her tone. She was getting really good at falling into her roles when she grifted.

"We did similar jobs a few years back. I never saw him, but he shot me." Eliot gave Ray an easy grin, crossing his arms, "Good to officially meet you."

"Hey, saved your life, and we both got paid. Everyone wins. Please tell me you didn't think I'd fall for this bullshit."

"Excuse me?" Hardison was trying hard to keep this in his control, but it was already beyond his grasp.

"Nah, not really." Eliot shrugged easily, ignoring the glare Hardison sent him.

"Well, at least one of you is smart. Alright, real talk, boys and lady. Geoff is not the pampered CEO you guys are used to dealing with. This," he waved his hands vaguely at the room, "is gonna be a neon sign that you people are trying to con him, and he will shoot you. On sight. You probably actually wouldn't make it out of the building." he held his hands up when Eliot took on a much more aggressive stance, "Buuuut, he doesn't know I'm here. You offered a pretty penny, and I'm still willing to help if you want."

"You... Still want to help us?" Hardison hesitated, but eyed the male.

Ray shrugged a little, "Geoff's a good boss and all, but come on, the only way you make a profit is if you have a healthy amount of competition, and he doesn't exactly encourage that. You offered a cushy amount that, on top of what I have stashed away, could get me far from his reach, and I could start a new career. I'm thinking Venezuela."

Hardison was stunned into silence a moment, but a quick kick from Parker had him straightening a little, "What did you have in mind?"

And Eliot didn't like the sharp smile that Ray flashed the hacker, but it was gone in a flash, the sharpshooter crossing the room to flop down on the couch, kicking his feet up, "Keep it simple, keep it easy, my friend. You go in there with too much pizzazz and Geoff knows something's up. You show up with Eliot, I throw in a good couple of words about you guys doing good on the east coast, have a couple easy to find files on your 'gang', have several hard to find ones, enough to keep Ryan content with the bull shit you're spewing, and make a drug deal."

"Hit them at the transfer." Eliot murmured, easily linking what Ray was shooting for, the Hispanic giving him a wink and a wicked grin.

"Exactly. Get the goods while they're distracted with the shiny you dangle in front of them, all of the goods. The Fake's main source of revenue is drugs, they won't recover from this, guaranteed, not in time to bribe the cops who'll move in when they realize Geoff's lost his grip on things, and I'll know what's coming, so I'll be gone before that."

"That's... A good plan. And you're sure it'll work?" Hardison eyed Ray.

"Come on, you've got an inside man, I'll make sure it works." The lad grinned widely.

"Alright. We'll give it a shot."

Eliot still didn't feel too good about this, but he nodded anyway.


End file.
